Meet man’s new best friend.

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Dick Polish Masturbation Cream is formulated for longevity, perfect for when a quick one turns into a full-blown epic. Designed to “melt” at body temperature, Dick Polish will leave you slicker than your browser history.  Whether you’re edging until you forget your own name, gooning yourself into a dopamine coma or simply enjoying some well-deserved “me” time, Dick Polish will always be your loyal companion, right to the last stroke.

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Made by FuckWater, Dick Polish is an oil-based cream and is not compatible with condoms.

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Ingredients: Petrolatum, Mineral Oil/Paraffinum Liquidum, Hydrogenated Soybean Oil, Paraffin, Stearic Acid, Microcrystalline Wax, Tocopheryl Acetate, Canola Oil, Aloe Barbadensis Leaf Extract, Tocopheral, Glycine Soja (Soybean) Oil.

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PROUDLY MADE IN CANADA.

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Available in 9oz jars.